Satirical Pinoy 103 - The VAT Man Returns…

Loser-senatorial candidate Ralph Recto is now the new economic head after receiving warm welcome from the NEDA staff.  And the first agenda of the new chief is what else?  To defend the E-VAT.  Secretary Recto, right now - the proper address perhaps – is not advising the removal of E-VAT to electricity and oil since there would be additional crisis in implementing and getting the government funds for present and future(?) projects of the government.

 

The E-VAT’s principal author, unsurprisingly, is Senator Ralph Recto.  And RA 9337, or most commonly known as the E-VAT law, the law that gave a heavy burden to the entire Filipino people by applying increased taxes mostly on commodity goods and services, is also the primary issue why he lost the 2007 senatorial election where he was campaigning to be re-elected.

 

The “Husband for all seasons”, proclaimed by many as an expert in the social science of economics, is back at the government together with his baby pet, and the even more hungrier Filipino people will have another thing to worry about besides looking for jobs and food.

 

The VAT Man is back… and he is having the last laugh…

Satirical Pinoy 102 - Consuelo de Bobo

Gloria Macapagal Arroyo is erecting a “memorial marker" in Sibuyan Island in honor of the people who died in the MV Princess of the Stars tragedy.


This is not a bad idea, since the commemorative structure will be an existing evidence of the incompetence of the Arroyo government in providing basic services and ensuring the safety of the public, not to mention the billions of pesos that they stole from government funds.  For the first time in this administration, they are doing something appreciative, which is to create a grim reminder of GMA’s efforts in making the lives of every Filipino miserable in every way possible.


The government has also said that the structure will probably be built near the coast of Sibuyan Island.  Perhaps they think this is a positive consolation befitting all the families of those who died because the government is not doing its responsibility.  And hours before the tragedy, our dear leader opted to fly to the United States including her junkets, to evade typhoon Frank and negotiate for US aid in millions of dollars, which would probably be untraceable in the future.


The government has yet to decide what kind of memorial structure they would be erecting. They said that they are choosing between building a lighthouse, or a buoy, or a platform for the memorial.  It would also be bearing the names of passengers and crewmen who were killed in the incident.  Let’s just hope that the ghost of all those who died there would haunt them for their mistakes…


(photo courtesy of http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/in_pictures/7468565.stm)

Satirical Pinoy 101 - da Commissioner, EDSA , Libingan, & one Lucky Bitch

Introduction:

 

I watch the news but I have always stayed away from politics.  I have always hated indulging in political discussion way back when I was young, when I could always hear opinions from customers of my Lolo’s barber shop where I usually hang out since I was given the task by my Tita to watch out for that cunning barber who cheats us of hard earned pesos and use it for his womanizing ways. Yes I know, I am not totally stupid [some parts are still missing], I know what happens when the shop closes.  Aside from the barber shop, the store next door is busy with tambays, Ginebra gin, water as chaser, and if it feels lucky, there’s pulutan to grab and eat periodically, but most of the time it’s politics.

 

Politics warms the blood during cold mornings.  I just have to turn on the TV early at dawn and watch how today’s political events are shaping up.  Things have never been this amusing since 1986.  Yes, I already existed in 1986, and the year before that, and Ninoy’s alleged assassination, and years before that.  Basically I have gathered information from the common tao’s perspective, which truly are amazing in their sense of grasping the situation and sometimes make it argumentative which is the most interesting part.  So I figured, I am making some comments in the world of free speech and democracy, satirically speaking.

 

and so it goes...

 

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Former COMELEC Chair Benjamin Abalos is so into news these days.  From the automated poll bid that went sour, the 2004 Hello Garci election event, Joey de Venecia statements, the famous “may 200 ka dito” from Secretary Neri, the Lozada revelations, and lastly I heard he was into burJer. I know, it’s burger and not burJer, I misspelled but I was merely reacting to pronunciations.  By the way I think the administration made a mistake in appointing him as Chairman of the COMELEC.  They should have appointed him as Commissioner instead.  Get it? Commissioner…

 

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On Monday they will be celebrating the People Power Anniversary.  I remember the radios before, Cardinal Sin said go to EDSA and protect Ramos and Enrile.  I got a text from a friend yesterday and it said, go to EDSA, there’s midnight sale.  People Power is a miscoined term.  It should have been Bloodless Revolution of EDSA.  It was not through the collective effort of people and nuns and priest and Ramos and Enrile in human chains that made it one of unusual stories of hope in our history.  It has always been the military’s decision on whom to support.  It happened in 86, it happened in 2001, and it will not happen again.  This time the situation has changed, the critics don’t have the military’s support.  Period.  No revolution has ever succeeded without the support of the military. 

 

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Early this morning I saw the program at the Libingan ng mga Bayani.  What event was that? Something about heroes, I forgot since I was busy getting coffee since it was cold.  I wonder how many heroes were buried there.  And are they all heroes?  Can the OFW’s be buried there?  After all, they are the new heroes.  Or is that only for the rich and famous?  Somebody suggested that it should be renamed Libingan ng mga Bayawak.  I wonder who they are planning to bury there in the future…

 

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The “Lucky Bitch” joke has already been immortalized around the globe.  I guess Neri’s evil comment was much nicer after all.  I’d love to see how it happened.  Anyways Gov. Joey Salceda has already apologized about the comment intended as a joke but unfortunately, it was interpreted out of context. Malacañang just brushed it aside.  Gov. Salceda is the one lucky this time…

 

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Ink’s over.  Maybe next time I’ll be able to make more comments. Maybe.